doctor6: (d6 windswept)
Peri asked me once how I could be so heartless in the face of another's apparent suffering. How could I be so cold and detached from the plight of others? She was understandably angry at the time and I don't blame her one bit for the sentiment. Come to think of it, Tegan and Sarah Jane have also accused me of being unsympathetic. "Inhuman," to be exact. They forget sometimes that I am not human. While I may appear to be homosapien, I am far from it. I am an alien in more than just physiology, but it's often hard for them to think of me as more than just an eccentric scientist with a rather unusual spacecraft.

That said, I am not without feeling. It pains me to see any single being or civilization made to suffer the cruelties of others, be it Dalek, Cybermen, Sontaran, or home grown terror. But I must keep my emotions under strict control. Especially the truth of how much my companions mean to me; not only their safety but their friendship. There have been too many times that I would have liked nothing better than to comfort them or hug them or confide how important they are to me. Sometimes to my very existence. And while I will, upon rare occasion, demonstrate some affection for them, I refrain from anything that might be considered overly emotional or "human." If my companions were to discover how truly important they are to me, then so, too, might my enemies. And that is a risk I will not take. Not so much for my sake as for those souls brave and adventurous enough to travel with me, and to call me friend.
doctor6: (Default)
I must admit that I am rather partial to tea time, especially as it isn't something I can always indulge in. In fact, it's a very rare occurence. Daleks and Cybermen and Sontarans are hardly likely to pause their plans for galactic domination to observe such a civilized ritual. You see my dilemma. Still, when I can actually find a moment of peace, tea time is a welcome respite.

I don't have a favorite tea. I like them all, really. And nothing goes better with tea than a lovely, freshly baked blueberry muffin. Such a civilized people, the British. I think they might be quite my favorite homosapien.
doctor6: (d6 up)
Ah, Gallifrey. In spite of what you may have heard, it isn't all stuffed collars and hallowed halls. The Academy, the Citadel, the Panopticon, the oh-so-prestigious and conceited society of the Time Lords, is not the sum total of what the planet has to offer.

For the most part, I grew up away from Time Lord society until it was my time to enter the Academy. While I can't be certain, I suspect that my parents had also had enough of the conceits of our society and chose to live apart from it, in spite of their Prydonian status. My life is all the richer for it. Our home was small and unassuming, situated in the beautiful, lush green Gallifreyan countryside. Earth's Great Britain reminds me a bit of home. Well, if you were to put an 8,000 meter mountain in the middle of Yorkshire. There was a mountain behind our house, practically in the back yard. I loved exploring it's slopes and its valleys, the gullies and culverts and caves. I conducted many an adventure on that mountainside, sometimes pretending to be the fabled and beneficent Rassilon as he harnessed a energies of a black hole. In a young lad's imagination, caves serve quite well as a black hole. Even better for getting into mischief. I'm rather good at that, it seems.
doctor6: (d6 windswept)
In my existence? I think I'll interpret that to mean my present incarnation, as that's the existence that's of immediate concern to me.

So. Given that understanding, the biggest obstacle I have overcome in my existence is – myself. Or rather, the supposed amalgamation of my darker side that calls himself the Valeyard. Not that I fully believe such a thing possible, especially when the claim comes from someone as disreputable as the Master. But when you've been around as long as I have you learn that even the impossible might be probable.

Irregardless of who he claimed to be, suffice it to say that the Boneyard Valeyard very nearly succeeded in destroying my life for the shear perverted joy of it. The fact that several corrupt members of the High Council of Time Lords promised him the remainder of my regenerations as reward for his services should he successfully prosecute me on a charge of genocide, didn't sway him from trying to vaporize them with a Particle Disseminator.

He very nearly succeeded in both. I can't say that I've ever had reason to thank the Master before, but I must admit that his rather surprising intervention and revelation to the court made all the difference. The old rogue gave me a new understanding of the situation that enabled me to second guess the Knackersyard Valeyard's intentions. I was able to thwart the plan but not before he managed to escape justice. I imagine he's out there somewhere, waiting for another opportunity to finish what he started. And I'll be right there, ready to challenge him.

To thine own self be true. But sometimes, you have to make exceptions.
doctor6: (d6 windswept)
Unless you've been on trial for your very lives, you couldn't possibly understand. Have you ever found yourself literally yanked out of time and space and into a courtroom filled with hostile faces, and not a friend among them? Only to learn that you are being judged and condemned for caring and trying to make a difference instead of just sitting around on your arse for millenia, unlike the High Council members of a certain "advanced" civilization I could mention . . .

I have been persecuted and prosecuted on any number of occasions, but that particular Trial was the first time that even I doubted my innocence. It's bad enough when there are no friends to support you, but when you can't even find faith in yourself and your motivation? Now that is being truly alone.
doctor6: (d6 pensive)
Heart's Desire: Think about something you once wanted so badly but never acquired. Write about how you think your life would’ve been different if you had received what your heart desired.

Well, I certainly wouldn't mind getting my hands on a TARDIS recall device! How that Clown ever managed to have one when I am quite clearly the more deserving recipient, I can't possibly imagine. Still, I wouldn't exactly call that my hearts' desire. The phrase implies something nearly impossible to obtain, which a recall device is not. It's just a matter of who you know.

To tell the absolute truth, I have what I've always wanted. To travel through time and space; to make a difference in the cosmos. I never asked for more than that.

Except . . . I will admit to fantasizing, every now and then, that Time Lords as a people would stop being so insular and do something proactive for a change. I don't mean by changing history or transgressing the Laws of Time. No, I mean by offering a hand to those civilizations less fortunate than our own. The ones deserving of a chance they might not otherwise be given. I can only imagine! Instead of sitting on their collective arses contemplating Infinity, the Time Lords could be known for their benevolence as caring advisors and guiding influences. Think of how many galactic wars could be averted! How many dying races could be given the chance to rise to their potential. How many lives might be saved? How many cultures allowed to flourish?

Fortunately, I am not so naïve as to think that such a thing will ever be even remotely possible.
doctor6: (d6 windswept)
If you could meet any famous personality, living or dead, and smack them in the head with a large trout, who would it be?

Now there is a novel weapon! A means by which to humiliate without doing any irreparable damage. Unless, of course, you happen to be the trout.

I imagine there's any number of famous personages that would qualify for such an assault. Did you know that many cultures consider fish oil to enhance cerebral activities? Literally food for thought. That being the case, I'd readily use a trout or a gumblejack or Moby Dick himself on Cardinal Borusa if it meant instilling some wisdom in the process. He wasn't the most likeable professor at the Academy, but I truly believe he had the best interests of Gallifrey – if not his students – at hearts. I can only surmise that something went seriously wrong during his last regeneration. Unfortunately, there is a sad truth to Lord Acton's words that power corrupts, but absolute power corrupts absolutely. The Borusa I knew would never have wanted to be Lord High President indefinitely. But then, I could never have imagined that Borusa would rival the Master for megalomania. Unthinkable, but all too terrible a reality.
doctor6: (d6 tardis)
One? Just one!? I am over 800 terran years old! Supposing I even believed in an afterlife, which I don't, how can I possibly be expected to pick only one memory of literally millions? It's ludicrous, that's what it is. As if one single moment in time or space could sustain someone of my cosmic experience for the rest of eternity.

Yes, yes, alright! Just for the sake of argument, is it? And yes, I do know what a hypothetical question is!

Supposing, just for the moment, that there actually is some sort of metaphysical an afterlife and I could only take one memory into it, I'd choose the TARDIS. Not just her physical shape and form but the feel of her. We share a connection that goes beyond mere words. And the sound of her. The quiet hum. The dematerialization circuit as we arrive at some new time and destination in the cosmos. That solid, satisfying thump as the central console comes to a rest. And the rooms! The ones that haven't been jetisoned, at any rate. The TARDIS is more than just a collection of console rooms and steerage, you know. So, there you are. That's what I'd take with me. As fond and complete a memory of the old girl as I can conjure. My truest traveling companion and my home.
doctor6: (d6 pensive)
Which are you more afraid of: Being too gullible and believing things that aren't true, or being too skeptical and missing out on something important?

My, my! That's a rather convoluted question, don't you think? Wouldn't it be easier to simply ask whether I was gullible or skeptical? Not that I haven't had my moments of gullibility. Who hasn't? But gullibility is something that diminishes with experience. Skepticism fills that void rather easily. Which am I afraid of? Both, to be perfectly honest. In my position, I can't afford to be either too gullible or too skeptical. At the risk of sounding a braggart, sometimes entire civilizations -- even the Cosmos itself! -- could hang on the balance of a single decision left to me. It's daunting, to say the least. I shudder to think of what would happen if I made the wrong decision because I was too accepting or too close-minded. It could literally be catastrophic! Instead, I try to walk the middle ground and find that happy medium. Most of the time I succeed. But leaning too far to one extreme or the other? That does indeed frighten me. Because it means I am no longer being objective.


May. 4th, 2005 11:06 am
doctor6: (d6 peri)
"You're kidding?"

The Doctor stopped in mid-stride, his riotously colorful patchwork jacket, striped yellow trousers, and lime green spats at odds with the grey and gloomy terrain. He turned and arched an eyebrow at his companion. "I am doing nothing of the sort."

Perpegillium Brown pouted, not the least bit happy. She was finding that traveling with this particular aspect of the Doctor was not so much adventuresome and thrilling as it was dark and dangerous. "You want me to just walk across that . . . that swamp?"

"That swamp, as you call it, is perfectly safe. Merely an holographic illusion to dissuade hungry predators and unsavory characters from poking their noses where they don't belong."

"A hologram."

"That's right."

"Perfectly safe."

"Completely and absolutely. A few more steps and we'll find ourselves on the other side of the energy barrier and in the heart of one of the most beautiful tropic resorts in the cosmos."

Peri's expression was clearly skeptical.

"Trust me," he told her with an engaging smile, then turned and strode off once more.

"I was afraid you'd say that," she grumbled. In her experience, nothing good ever followed the Doctor's invoking the phrase "trust me."

But then, what other choice did she have?

With a heavy sigh, Peri slogged into the swamp after him.
doctor6: (d6 tardis)
I wouldn't exactly call her a possession. Certainly not in her hearing! She's rather temperamental about that sort of thing, you know. Takes it quite personally and I can't say as I blame her. Say, rather, that I belong to her. It does seem that way more often than not. I may command the vessel but the heart that beats within . . . well, that's entirely her own. Still, I can't imagine ever being separated from her. Or she from me, for that matter. We share a special bond. Something more than just man and machine, Time Lord and TARDIS. We share a sense of adventure. Of curiosity. Of childish wonder in anticipation of what lays around the next bend or beyond the farthest galaxy.

So, no, I don't think it would be fair at all to call the TARDIS my most prized possession. Say instead that she is my ship. My home. My constant companion. And where my hearts are.
doctor6: (d6 console)
If you could do one totally irresponsible or even bad thing with absolutely no consequences, what would it be and why?

I would alter the course of known History with deliberation and malice aforethought. Without any regard for Temporal Law or the consequences on the Cosmos, I would intervene in events that, in my concerted opinion, should have ended entirely differently. Take your own Terran history, for example. I would literally change the course of the Titanic by means of a timely warning to Captain Smith that there were icebergs ahead. Think of all of the lives that could have been spared that night! No one need ever have died. Or what if a meteor had never hit Earth, setting in motion a chain reaction that would result in the demise of the dinosaurs? Not that I have any particular affinity for dinosaurs, other than they're quite fascinating creatures – from a distance. You see, it wasn't a meteor that created that cataclysm. It was a spaceship with a friend of mine trapped inside it. A young man I was responsible for. If I cared nothing for Temporal Law, I would return in the TARDIS and change that event in order to save Adric. And if I did, Earth as you know it would not exist. For all I know, the dinosaurs might be roaming there still. Not that I would care. The end would have justified the means.

But then, that would make me The Master.
doctor6: (d6 windswept)
There's nothing quite so frightening as a glimpse into the future at events that will be or might be. Especially when it is something catastrophic. It isn't so much the events themselves as the uncertainty of whether it was you who brought them about -- or might have prevented, had you known how.

But even more frightening than that uncertainty is seeing a glimpse of yourself from that future, and not recognizing what you'd become. A being wholly opposite everything that you have ever believed in or valued. A creature that can only be a representation of the darkest side of your nature. A side you had always denied existed. Seeing that future self in the flesh and knowing that, short of self annihilation, you are helpless to prevent it from becoming a reality "scares" me. Because in the not too distant future, I may very well be more than own worst enemy. I might indeed jeopardize the entire Cosmos.
doctor6: (d6 brolly)
Being over 800 terran years old, naturally there are bound to be a few things I've become dissatisfied with. That last incarnation, for instance. Seriously. Celery? What on Kasterborous possessed me -- him -- to wear such a thing? And on a cricket outfit no less! Not that I should single him out over the others. I'm afraid I can think of at least one thing for each of my previous incarnations. Fortunately, this particular regeneration is working out much more to my satisfaction. So I can't really say that I'm dissatisfied with anything in this particular 'life.'

Well, perhaps there is one thing. I have yet to find a truly decent cup of tea anywhere in the cosmos . . .
doctor6: (d6 windswept)
If you could change one person's mind about something, who and what would it be?

To this day I'll never know what it was that turned Chancellor -- your pardon, Lord High President Borusa from a defender of the Law to a power-hungry megalomaniac. I suppose it might have been a faulty regeneration. They do happen, you know. Sometimes the mind can't handle the sudden change in appearance, personality, psychology. But Borusa was always so strong! So pompously righteous when it came to keeping Gallifrey and it's traditions sacrosanct. The Borusa I knew in University . . . the Chancellor . . . the President . . . that Borusa would rather die than transgress the Laws of Time!

But something happened. Something changed. And with that change came a lust for power I have seen entirely too often in other races. In other madmen.

If I had only known! If I could only understand what his last regeneration had done to his mind. We are a very long-lived race, we Time Lords. But Borusa thought he deserved more. He deserved immortality. Like every other megalomaniac, he convinced himself it was for the good of all. That the end would justify the means.

Could I have talked sense into him? Kept him from using the Time Scoop and assaulting the Black Tower of Rassilon? Kept him from taking the Ring of Rassilon, and the curse it carried? If I could have spoken to him, just for a few moments!, I might have saved him from an eternity of living hell . . .
doctor6: (d6 brolly)
1. What do you feel is your best personality trait?

My compassion. Something I'm afraid most of my brother Time Lords are lacking.

2. Your worst?

Worst? Well . . . if you were to ask my companions, they might say my arrogance. Peri especially. She's a very excitable girl. Arrogant. The very idea! I'm not, you know.

3. What brings you the most peace?


4. What are three things that you feel you could not live without?

My TARDIS, good literature, and a nice cup of tea.

5. What is your favorite activity?

Exploring new worlds and civilizations.

Care to give it a go? Then by all means, leave a comment. I'll ask you five questions, you post the answers in your journal and leave me a comment with a link to the answers. Then let your friends request five questions from you.
doctor6: (d6 tardis)
All I ask is a tall ship and a star to steer her by.

I'm inclined to say my TARDIS. We've been through many an adventure together, she and I. I'm afraid the High Council of the Time Lords would beg to differ, seeing as I acquired the old girl in a rather unorthodox way. Apparently the adage that possession is nine tenths of the law only applies when they are the ones doing the possessing. Given that, the old girl isn't technically mine. Quibbling semantics, really.

Well then. If you would question my ownership of the TARDIS, you certainly cannot doubt our very special bond. It goes beyond a mere symbiotic link between man and machine. The TARDIS and I share a desire for exploration and discovery. For adventure and travel. My relationship with my ship – that connection -- is uniquely mine.
doctor6: (d6 windswept)
More than one of my companions has accused me of being dispassionate and devoid of the capacity to experience love. Once, Sarah Jane even went so far as to call me inhuman. I'm afraid therein lies the truth of the matter. I am not of the species homosapien, although just about everybeing makes that mistake. And while I may not experience the emotional equivalent of love that humans are always mooning about, I do have an understanding of the concept. I'm not unfeeling or hearts-less, you know.

Without love there would be no romance in culture. I shudder to think of the great works of art that might never have been born without the inspiration of love to guide the author's quill or the painter's brush. I have yet to see the civilization that can thrive without some aspect of love upon which to build. It is the passion to persevere against impossible odds; to stand for a cause or a belief because it stirs something deep within. It is compassion for another. It is sacrifice and pain. It is at once fanciful and concrete.

Love may be the most diverse emotion in the Cosmos, rivaled only by hatred.

And that is my passion. My love, if you will. To circumvent hatred in all it's guises, anywhere and anywhen.
doctor6: (d6 tardis)
I always thought that 'happily ever after' implied one had the desire to settle into some blissful but dull sort of retirement. Like Cinderella and her Prince Charming or Gebulous Eronas and the Rutan. I, however, intend to keep right on going as long as I have the temerity, tenacity, and the regenerations to do so. You see, my happily ever after would be to continue doing precisely what I am doing now. Traveling! Seeing the Universe. Experiencing alien cultures and, upon occasion, sharing with them the benefit of my expertise. And if a few despots are deposed or wars averted along the way, well! So much the better.
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